November 23, 2009

Dear Alexander:

I cannot belive it has been a whole year since you left us. It feels like yesterday but at the same time it feels like a lifetime. I miss you. I miss your smile, your coo's, and most of all I just miss you as a whole. As I sit here tonight and reflect, all I think of is how I can get you back. I cant. No matter what I do, what I say, or what I have to trade.....you are never coming back. Why did you have to go so early? I was supposed to die before you. I was supposed to tend to you, love you, and take care of you till the end of my time. I have been robbed of that. What did I ever do to deserve this? Although I would never take back the time I spent with you, I am selfish and it wasn't long enough. I want to know where you are, what you are doing, and most of all what you are thinking? Did I disappoint you as a mother? I just want you to know how much I love you, how much I miss you, and that I will never forget you. I will do all in my power to keep your memory alive. Some don't like to talk about you in fear of it hurting me or because it just hurts them too much. But don't ever think that they have forgotten you. You are too special and too amazing to forget. You have changed me for the better. I am a better person because of you. You are never far from my thoughts and I will always hold you close to my heart.



You have missed so much this year. But most of all....We have missed you!